[ it's real enough that steve sags against him the moment he doesn't pull away, soaking up the way it feels and how reassuring it is that nate isn't running. he will, probably. this is only temporary, the way their arrangement had been temporary, and steve thinks he should have tried harder to show just how much he enjoyed having nate around.
the quiet didn't feel so lonely. their relationship felt... natural.
but it was always something he had to give up, and he thinks about that even as the hand against his back settles there. light and careful. a presence he still misses and will if nate continues to believe he needs to be alone. time will always heal, but it's a ragged mess of phantom pains it leaves behind. so, he turns into nate and hugs him even tighter, tucking his face against his shoulder and waiting until he relents just a little more. ]
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the quiet didn't feel so lonely. their relationship felt... natural.
but it was always something he had to give up, and he thinks about that even as the hand against his back settles there. light and careful. a presence he still misses and will if nate continues to believe he needs to be alone. time will always heal, but it's a ragged mess of phantom pains it leaves behind. so, he turns into nate and hugs him even tighter, tucking his face against his shoulder and waiting until he relents just a little more. ]