[Wade is looking him in the eyes when Nate says that but it almost makes him bashful. Why did he always have to be so cute? He looks down at the sheets between them.]
Do you? [That makes one of them.] Even if I like getting hurt? Even if I'm a mess?
[He peaks up at him through lashes, the only hair on his body left. Wade squeezes the hand that he's holding, then launches himself at Nate to kiss him out of nowhere, pressing him down on the bed as he does.
When he finally pulls back, he's teary-eyed.]
I don't understand why you feel that way, but I'm grateful. I've never... I've never told you why I'm like this, have I? What... happened to me?
( there's a brief flicker of surprise that he feels when wade suddenly launches himself at himβ on him and practically drowns him there in a kiss he can't help but softly moan into. this is nice β wade is nice and this is how it should be, with no drugs involved.
when he catches that look there in the other mutant's eyes, he feels protective of wade then β reaches up with a hand and gently cradles the side of his face as he stares to him. as he listens to him. )
No. You haven't.
( and he hasn't ever pried inside his mind to see for himself. he could β he knows he could, but. he's being better about that. about giving people their privacy. )
[He's told plenty of people about it before. So there's no real apprehension in saying it. His eyes are watering because he's an emotional whirlwind.]
It is why I freaked out when they tried to make Scott and I do that medical kink shit. And why I hate hospitals.
[Wade rests his head against Nate's, taking a breath.]
After I got cancer. I tried everything. Chemotherapy. Clean eating. Herbs. A witch doctor. Nothing worked. This guy shows up out of nowhere and says the organization he works for can cure my cancer and make me a superhero.
The first time he showed up I told him to fuck off, but when it became clear nothing was going to work and I was going to die, I figured fuck it. What's the worst that could happen? And at least this way Vanessa wouldn't have to watch me die...
( fingers brush along the nape of wade's neck when he goes and presses his forehead to his, his other hand smoothing along the curve of his spine. keeping him close. reassuring him with touch instead of words.
as he explains, nate listens β tries to not see for himself what had happened with a glimpse into his memories as he tells him. he knows wade has cancer β he remembers he'd been dying when his powers had been nullified with that collar on him. but the extent of it... everything that had happened prior to it and prior to here... no. he doesn't know.
hand smoothing up to brush across his shoulder blades, blue eyes softly looking to wade, still quiet before he comes to swallow, nosing at wade in the softest way he can. )
You didn't want to die. There's nothing messed up about that.
If only I'd known there were worse things than death.
[He lets out a soft sigh when Nate's hand runs along his back, relaxing into the touch, eyes closing as he keeps talking.]
Turns out their plan was to torture me until my mutant powers manifested. I was basically a lab rat. They didn't care if I lived or died. I don't know how long I was there. Months maybe? I got drowned, burned, and deprived of oxygen. Pretty much a smorgasbord of torture. Anything and everything that you could think of. All at the hands of this fuck named Francis.
( he finds he doesn't need to be a telepath β to have that empathic connection with others to feel the pain that wade must have gone through and that some part of him might still carry with him within his memories. anyone capable of feeling would feel for him and nate can't help but bring both hands to gently cradle the other mutant's face within them, bright blue eyes sadly looking to him from his spot beneath his... beneath wade. )
I'm sorry.
( soft, sincere. a shake of his head, he noses at wade, gently. )
I won't let anyone hurt you like that again. Not in a way that leaves deep scars on your mind.
( because wade has physical scars, he knows. wade likes to be hurt by others, he knows. but this? this was something entirely different. this was cruel in a way that wade didn't want or deserve and nate will rearrange every atom and cell within anyone who tries to hurt him like this again and blow them apart. )
[Letting people hurt him as he does probably isn't particularly helping his mental state, even if he's seeking it out and wants it. Each wound leaves its mark in its way. Yet, Wade's not sure he can stop.]
You can't promise that. And I can handle it.
[He tries to reassure him with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.]
There's a poem or a saying or something that's like... we're stronger in the broken places? Something like that. I'm sure I'm remembering it wrong. Still, it sounds about right. They may have broken me in some ways, but I'm strong. And they never once let them shut me up. [Getting on Francis' nerves had been the only thing that had kept him going for a while.] No one ever will.
( you should really be careful, wade. nate is capable of extraordinary things that even he himself isn't yet aware of. still, while he may not be able to one hundred percent promise it, he intends to see it through about ninety-nine percent of the way.
gently, he slips a hand away from wade's cheek and drags the tips of his fingers softly across the other's face β his forehead, blue eyes watching their path as he does. he could take it all away, he thinks. take away the memories of pain and torture that wade has endured and still carries with him. he could just... make them no longer exist, but. he doesn't. wade's words about being broken pulling him from those thoughts and having his gaze linger there on his. )
I like that you don't. ( shut up, he means. ) Even if I don't always know what you're talking about.
( smile there soft and warm on his lips, he noses at wade again, letting that hand fall away from his face and gently hold at the back of his neck. )
You're a little broken and I'm a little lost. But that's ok. Cause we have each other.
[Without the pain and torture Wade wouldn't be who he is. Even before Francis, he'd been broken by his childhood, by the military. Those things shaped him. Without them, who might he be? ]
It's better you don't know what I'm talking about. Half the time I don't even know what I'm talking about.
[He just looks in Nate's eyes, admiring the feeling he could see in them without Nate needing to project them to him. Wade sometimes wonders if he's been selfish, in allowing this... whatever it was to grow between them. Nate wasn't even half his age. Then there was the matter that Wade didn't believe he was good for anyone, not after losing Vanessa.]
We do, don't we? [He keeps finding himself seeking Nate out, thinking about him when he's not there. Then he's willing to do whatever he can to make him happy. He knows what it all means. Wade's not usually so reluctant to bandy about the word love. But that's when it's a joke. When he doesn't actually care. Or when he assumes the other person won't actually know how serious he is.] And I'm not going anywhere.
[That may be a promise Wade can't keep either, but he'll try his damnedest.]
( he knows neither of them can make such a bold promise as that. nothing can really be promised here, he thinks. but that doesn't stop him from wanting to make them β from wanting to show just how much he cares and how much he's willing to do for him... for this.
smile there soft on his lips, reassurance given to wade in the form of gentle touches to his face and neck, he drops his head back against the pillows, bringing a leg up to bend at the knee there, settling against the other mutant's side. )
Good. Cause neither am I.
( and he seals that deal of theirs with a kiss, leaning up some. a slow, sweet, tender kiss. full of everything that he quietly feels for wade. )
[Wade meets those kisses just as tenderly, but eventually he starts to grow needier, mouth falling to the other man's neck.]
I am curious though. [Wade moves to settle on top of him more fully, fingers falling to the shirt Nate's got on, tugging at it. He smiles against his neck, mumbling in between mouthing skin.] Why the fuck did you bother putting on clothes? It's like you don't even like me at all, Nate. I'm very upset right now. Inconsolable.
( laughter spills from his lips in a way that's both soft and warm, head tipping back to give wade better access to his neck he seems to be mouthing at. )
I thought you might need a bit of rest after your three day adventure.
( hands finding their way around wade, he smooths them along the other man's shoulder blades. slow and sensual. )
Didn't want to get you all hot and bothered with seeing me naked.
[He opens his mouth dragging his teeth down to his collarbone. Nate's laughter pools his body with pleasure, blooming from his belly outward. Wade liked making people laugh, him especially.]
That's my secret, Nate. I'm always hot and bothered.
[Wade nips at his neck, grinding against him as he's already starting to get hard. Maybe he'd come originally just thinking he wanted to spend time with him and unwind, but he couldn't seem to help himself.]
( the sound that leaves him when wade grinds down against him is a breathless gasp, bright blue eyes falling shut and lips parting to give way to a pleased little noise. he swallows, hands slow in the way they brush along those shoulder blades, and he grips at wade's arms then, tipping his head forward and letting those blue eyes flutter open. )
I missed you.
( words that leave his lips a little softer than he maybe means them to be but completely honest and genuine. sheepish smile, he slowly rolls his hips up against wade's and hums a little, eyes falling shut for just a second or two as he does. )
[Pulling off Nate's shirt over his head, he sits up a moment to tear off his own. He groans, grinding his growing erection even more needfully against Nate's. ]
I missed you too. And so did lil' Wade.
[Sometimes Wade does do his best to absolutely ruin a moment...]
( lucky for wade, it only gets a huff of laughter from nate. also, good thing he didn't change out of his pajama bottoms since those are a lot easier to slip out of and he might not be wearing anything else under them shock of shocks. nate freeballin' grey. )
I don't think he's all that little.
( words mumbled against his lips, nate slips a hand down between them and works his fingers over the outline of wade's bulge there, kissing him with a soft little moan as he does. )
No, he isn't. [Wade agrees cheekily as he continues to paw at Nate, before tugging down his own pants to let out the big guy.] But it's like an ironic lil'. Like Little John in Robin Hood.
[The question makes him sputter and do a double take like he can't believe it's Nate who's asked that question.] When you put it like that you have to know I absolutely am going to do that. [Because hearing Nate say 'breed me' made his cock jerk and pulse at the mere thought of it. He bites playfully at Nate's bottom lip.]
Do you want to take all my seed? Want me to fill you up?
( knowing it's something that wade seems to be into, it's easy for him to want to fall into itz especially if it gets the other mutant all riled up like he is.
smile on his lips, he noses at wade, letting lips brush over his, pushing that pleased little sound into the other's mouth. )
Yeah, I do.
( fingers stroking over that cock again, he nods with a soft hum. )
I really, really do.
( and as if to prove that point, he brings over a bottle of lube with his mind - no hands - and drops it down next to them on the bed. )
[There's probably little that Wade couldn't get into, kinky bastard that he is. He's busy staring at Nate, nibbling at his bottom lip, and peppering him with kisses that he doesn't notice the lube until it's fallen and he can feel it bump up against his side.
Glancing down, he grins, reaching for the bottle and squirting a very liberal amount onto his fingers before falling between them to tease at Nate's ass, spreading him.]
Who am I to say no to that? I can't. Know why? Because I'm a giver.
( this is still nate taking care of wade β making sure that he's emotionally ok despite his having been "factory reset" as he put it. this is still that, yes, but it's also nate wanting to explore more things with this very important person here in his life. someone he... appreciates. very much. in many deep ways.
so when wade seems practically thrilled with the whole breeding idea, it makes nate happy. not just to see wade light up for this, but because it's something else he gets to explore himself and with wade? he always feels safe in doing so.
legs spreading apart a little more, he shifts his hips up when he feels wade's fingers between those legs, lips chasing after his for a sweet but slightly heated kiss. )
[He emphasizes the words with his plunging fingers, watching the way Nate responds to him.
Wade is okay, more or less. The party had been a lot, and maybe had left a few people with harder recoveries, but pain is Wade's normal. Although there's no denying that being around Nate did heal some of his damage that had been there before the party that had certianly been exhasterbated by it.
Fingers pull out and he slicks up his cock before he starts to push himself inside, thrusting all the way to the hilt.]
If you're a good boy, I'll breed you twice. Really make sure I fill you up to the brim.
( the moment he feels wade nudge inside him, his head tips back and lips part, soft little gasp on them as he does. they've done this a number of times now β wade is really the one he sleeps with the most here, but even so, he's still getting used to being stretched and fucked like he is with wade but he always wants it β always wants this closeness between them.
fingers gripping at scarred biceps, the sound that leaves him when wade thrusts in deep is a strangled sort of cry that's a mix of pain and pleasure. he always just needs a second or two to get used to suddenly having someone inside him and to show that he's fine and that he just needs that second, he brushes the tips of his fingers along those biceps he'd been holding tight to, letting out a breath as he lifts his hips up against wade, soft little sound leaving his lips as he does. )
Gonna make a mess of the bed when it all leaks out.
( words he manages to murmur as he lifts his head and blindly catches wade's lips for a kiss. )
But that'd probably turn you on all over again, huh?
[Wade leans down to nuzzle at Nate's neck, letting out a shaky breath as he stays deep inside him until Nate adjusts. The soft cry out of Nate's lips does things to Wade, coils at his insides, and warms them. Wade laughs against his neck,]
Pretty much anything with you would turn me on all over again. [Because Wade is a smitten fucking idiot.]
no subject
Do you? [That makes one of them.] Even if I like getting hurt? Even if I'm a mess?
no subject
Yeah. Even then.
( and he means that. wholeheartedly. )
I wouldnβt have you any other way.
no subject
When he finally pulls back, he's teary-eyed.]
I don't understand why you feel that way, but I'm grateful. I've never... I've never told you why I'm like this, have I? What... happened to me?
no subject
when he catches that look there in the other mutant's eyes, he feels protective of wade then β reaches up with a hand and gently cradles the side of his face as he stares to him. as he listens to him. )
No. You haven't.
( and he hasn't ever pried inside his mind to see for himself. he could β he knows he could, but. he's being better about that. about giving people their privacy. )
If it's difficult for you... you don't have to.
cw: mention of cancer, torture
[He's told plenty of people about it before. So there's no real apprehension in saying it. His eyes are watering because he's an emotional whirlwind.]
It is why I freaked out when they tried to make Scott and I do that medical kink shit. And why I hate hospitals.
[Wade rests his head against Nate's, taking a breath.]
After I got cancer. I tried everything. Chemotherapy. Clean eating. Herbs. A witch doctor. Nothing worked. This guy shows up out of nowhere and says the organization he works for can cure my cancer and make me a superhero.
The first time he showed up I told him to fuck off, but when it became clear nothing was going to work and I was going to die, I figured fuck it. What's the worst that could happen? And at least this way Vanessa wouldn't have to watch me die...
cw: mentions of cancer and death
as he explains, nate listens β tries to not see for himself what had happened with a glimpse into his memories as he tells him. he knows wade has cancer β he remembers he'd been dying when his powers had been nullified with that collar on him. but the extent of it... everything that had happened prior to it and prior to here... no. he doesn't know.
hand smoothing up to brush across his shoulder blades, blue eyes softly looking to wade, still quiet before he comes to swallow, nosing at wade in the softest way he can. )
You didn't want to die. There's nothing messed up about that.
cw: mentions of cancer, torture, death
[He lets out a soft sigh when Nate's hand runs along his back, relaxing into the touch, eyes closing as he keeps talking.]
Turns out their plan was to torture me until my mutant powers manifested. I was basically a lab rat. They didn't care if I lived or died. I don't know how long I was there. Months maybe? I got drowned, burned, and deprived of oxygen. Pretty much a smorgasbord of torture. Anything and everything that you could think of. All at the hands of this fuck named Francis.
no subject
I'm sorry.
( soft, sincere. a shake of his head, he noses at wade, gently. )
I won't let anyone hurt you like that again. Not in a way that leaves deep scars on your mind.
( because wade has physical scars, he knows. wade likes to be hurt by others, he knows. but this? this was something entirely different. this was cruel in a way that wade didn't want or deserve and nate will rearrange every atom and cell within anyone who tries to hurt him like this again and blow them apart. )
no subject
You can't promise that. And I can handle it.
[He tries to reassure him with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.]
There's a poem or a saying or something that's like... we're stronger in the broken places? Something like that. I'm sure I'm remembering it wrong. Still, it sounds about right. They may have broken me in some ways, but I'm strong. And they never once let them shut me up. [Getting on Francis' nerves had been the only thing that had kept him going for a while.] No one ever will.
no subject
gently, he slips a hand away from wade's cheek and drags the tips of his fingers softly across the other's face β his forehead, blue eyes watching their path as he does. he could take it all away, he thinks. take away the memories of pain and torture that wade has endured and still carries with him. he could just... make them no longer exist, but. he doesn't. wade's words about being broken pulling him from those thoughts and having his gaze linger there on his. )
I like that you don't. ( shut up, he means. ) Even if I don't always know what you're talking about.
( smile there soft and warm on his lips, he noses at wade again, letting that hand fall away from his face and gently hold at the back of his neck. )
You're a little broken and I'm a little lost. But that's ok. Cause we have each other.
no subject
It's better you don't know what I'm talking about. Half the time I don't even know what I'm talking about.
[He just looks in Nate's eyes, admiring the feeling he could see in them without Nate needing to project them to him. Wade sometimes wonders if he's been selfish, in allowing this... whatever it was to grow between them. Nate wasn't even half his age. Then there was the matter that Wade didn't believe he was good for anyone, not after losing Vanessa.]
We do, don't we? [He keeps finding himself seeking Nate out, thinking about him when he's not there. Then he's willing to do whatever he can to make him happy. He knows what it all means. Wade's not usually so reluctant to bandy about the word love. But that's when it's a joke. When he doesn't actually care. Or when he assumes the other person won't actually know how serious he is.] And I'm not going anywhere.
[That may be a promise Wade can't keep either, but he'll try his damnedest.]
no subject
smile there soft on his lips, reassurance given to wade in the form of gentle touches to his face and neck, he drops his head back against the pillows, bringing a leg up to bend at the knee there, settling against the other mutant's side. )
Good. Cause neither am I.
( and he seals that deal of theirs with a kiss, leaning up some. a slow, sweet, tender kiss. full of everything that he quietly feels for wade. )
no subject
I am curious though. [Wade moves to settle on top of him more fully, fingers falling to the shirt Nate's got on, tugging at it. He smiles against his neck, mumbling in between mouthing skin.] Why the fuck did you bother putting on clothes? It's like you don't even like me at all, Nate. I'm very upset right now. Inconsolable.
no subject
I thought you might need a bit of rest after your three day adventure.
( hands finding their way around wade, he smooths them along the other man's shoulder blades. slow and sensual. )
Didn't want to get you all hot and bothered with seeing me naked.
no subject
That's my secret, Nate. I'm always hot and bothered.
[Wade nips at his neck, grinding against him as he's already starting to get hard. Maybe he'd come originally just thinking he wanted to spend time with him and unwind, but he couldn't seem to help himself.]
no subject
I missed you.
( words that leave his lips a little softer than he maybe means them to be but completely honest and genuine. sheepish smile, he slowly rolls his hips up against wade's and hums a little, eyes falling shut for just a second or two as he does. )
This feels better...
no subject
I missed you too. And so did lil' Wade.
[Sometimes Wade does do his best to absolutely ruin a moment...]
no subject
I don't think he's all that little.
( words mumbled against his lips, nate slips a hand down between them and works his fingers over the outline of wade's bulge there, kissing him with a soft little moan as he does. )
You gonna breed me before breakfast?
no subject
[The question makes him sputter and do a double take like he can't believe it's Nate who's asked that question.] When you put it like that you have to know I absolutely am going to do that. [Because hearing Nate say 'breed me' made his cock jerk and pulse at the mere thought of it. He bites playfully at Nate's bottom lip.]
Do you want to take all my seed? Want me to fill you up?
no subject
smile on his lips, he noses at wade, letting lips brush over his, pushing that pleased little sound into the other's mouth. )
Yeah, I do.
( fingers stroking over that cock again, he nods with a soft hum. )
I really, really do.
( and as if to prove that point, he brings over a bottle of lube with his mind - no hands - and drops it down next to them on the bed. )
no subject
Glancing down, he grins, reaching for the bottle and squirting a very liberal amount onto his fingers before falling between them to tease at Nate's ass, spreading him.]
Who am I to say no to that? I can't. Know why? Because I'm a giver.
no subject
so when wade seems practically thrilled with the whole breeding idea, it makes nate happy. not just to see wade light up for this, but because it's something else he gets to explore himself and with wade? he always feels safe in doing so.
legs spreading apart a little more, he shifts his hips up when he feels wade's fingers between those legs, lips chasing after his for a sweet but slightly heated kiss. )
You're gonna give it to me good, right?
no subject
[He emphasizes the words with his plunging fingers, watching the way Nate responds to him.
Wade is okay, more or less. The party had been a lot, and maybe had left a few people with harder recoveries, but pain is Wade's normal. Although there's no denying that being around Nate did heal some of his damage that had been there before the party that had certianly been exhasterbated by it.
Fingers pull out and he slicks up his cock before he starts to push himself inside, thrusting all the way to the hilt.]
If you're a good boy, I'll breed you twice. Really make sure I fill you up to the brim.
no subject
fingers gripping at scarred biceps, the sound that leaves him when wade thrusts in deep is a strangled sort of cry that's a mix of pain and pleasure. he always just needs a second or two to get used to suddenly having someone inside him and to show that he's fine and that he just needs that second, he brushes the tips of his fingers along those biceps he'd been holding tight to, letting out a breath as he lifts his hips up against wade, soft little sound leaving his lips as he does. )
Gonna make a mess of the bed when it all leaks out.
( words he manages to murmur as he lifts his head and blindly catches wade's lips for a kiss. )
But that'd probably turn you on all over again, huh?
no subject
Pretty much anything with you would turn me on all over again. [Because Wade is a smitten fucking idiot.]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
can fade here or with your tag I think <3